Nervous child counseling; Dos and don'ts that parents should know

"It's like I'm walking in the middle of a mine." This sentence describes many parents who live with a nervous child. Constant tantrums, outbursts of anger over small issues, impatience and irritability, create an atmosphere of tension and anxiety in the home and make parents tired, desperate and worried about their child's future. In this daily battle, it's natural to feel like you've tried every avenue and come to a dead end.

But the key to solving this conundrum is changing a fundamental perspective: What if your child's nervousness isn't an identity, but a symptom of an unacquired skill? A skill called regulating emotions.

Child Counseling Neuro is a specialized process designed not to suppress or coddle the child, but to teach him this vital skill and empower the parents. This article will help you to better understand your child's inner world and bring peace back home with completely scientific dos and don'ts.

Why is my child being stubborn? Rooting and treatment with the help of expert advice

Why does my child lose his temper early?

The first step in the process of counseling a neurotic child is to understand the roots of this behavior. Nervousness is a superficial behavior that can be caused by deep and different reasons:

• Inability to regulate emotions: Children's brains, especially at a young age, are still developing. The part responsible for controlling emotions and logic (prefrontal cortex) has not yet reached full maturity. Therefore, when faced with strong emotions such as anger or frustration, the child easily drowns and loses control.
• Sensory sensitivities or hidden anxiety: Sometimes, moodiness and irritability are a mask for anxiety. A child who is internally anxious has a low tolerance threshold. Also, some children are very sensitive to sensory stimuli (such as loud noises, bright lights or even the material of certain clothes) and this overstimulation manifests itself in the form of nervousness. Consulting a nervous child helps to identify these hidden reasons.
• Problems in impulse control: The braking system of the brain works weaker in some children. They act before they think and quickly go from a minor annoyance to an explosion of rage.
• Models learned from the environment: Children are the best role models in the world. They learn how to manage anger and stress from their parents and people around them. A tense family environment can directly fuel a child's nervousness.

5 key strategies that parents learn in counseling a nervous child

In the process of counseling a nervous child, parents learn how to use effective strategies to help the child calm down instead of escalating the crisis.

should Why is this effective? Practical example 1. Naming and validating feelings It helps the child learn the language of emotions, feels understood and shows him that his feelings are valid. Instead of saying, "Don't be mad!", say, "I see you're very angry because your tower broke. It's really disappointing." 2. Keeping your own peace You are the child's calm anchor in his emotional storm. Your calm will also spread to him and prevent the crisis from escalating. Take a deep breath, speak in a calm and measured voice and avoid getting into a power struggle and yelling at each other. 3. Setting firm but kind boundaries It separates emotions from unacceptable behavior. It gives the child security and structure and teaches him that expressing emotions should not be destructive. "I understand you're angry, but we're not allowed to hurt others or throw things." 4. Searching for the root cause It helps you to solve the underlying and hidden problem (hunger, fatigue, anxiety) instead of reacting to surface behavior (anger). Before reacting, ask yourself: Is he tired? is he hungry Did something happen at school? Does it need attention? 5. Focus on prevention Management of stimuli prevents many crises from occurring and helps to stabilize the child's mood by creating a predictable environment. Establishing a specific daily schedule, ensuring adequate sleep and proper nutrition, and preparing the child for changes and new situations

5 common mistakes of parents with nervous children

Sometimes, the best thing we can do is not do things that make things worse. In the table below, we discuss these common mistakes:

Don'ts چرا این کار مخرب است؟ alternative solution (must) shouting and retaliating This teaches the child that yelling is an acceptable method of communication and increases tension and fear in him. Remain calm, speak in a calm voice and use the "break" technique to calm both parties severe punishment or humiliation These methods not only do not teach the child anything, but also damage his self-esteem and cause hidden anger and resentment. Using logical consequences related to behavior (for example, "Because you threw the toy, you will be banned from playing with it for ten minutes") Ignoring the child's feelings Sentences like "Nothing happened!" or "Don't cry!" They give the child the message that his feelings are unimportant or wrong. Validating feelings: "You have a right to be upset." This is the first step in teaching emotional skills. Surrender to demands If the child learns that he can get what he wants by screaming, he will repeat this behavior over and over again. Stability in the implementation of laws. Even if it's hard, stick to your "no" and talk to your child after he's calmed down. Tagging the child Saying "you're a nervous kid" makes this trait a part of the child's identity and suggests that he is incapable of change. Focus on behavior, not personality: Instead of saying, "You're nervous," say, "That behavior was aggressive."

The role of child counseling in teaching anger control skills

A professional counseling for a neurotic child follows a multifaceted program:

Infographic of child anger control in counseling

Choosing the right child counselor to treat a nervous child

To manage this challenge, you need a counselor who specializes specifically in children's behavioral problems and parenting approaches. Look for someone with experience in neurotic child counseling and evidence-based approaches such as PMT or play therapy. "Rah Roshan" center is licensed by the Organization of Psychology and has experience in the field of child psychology.

Finally, remember that a nervous child is not a bad child; Rather, it is a child who is drowned in the world of his emotions and needs help to be saved. Child counseling helps you transform from a tired parent on the battlefield to a knowledgeable guide and calm anchor for your child. Taking the first step to get expert guidance is investing in your child's comfort today and resilience tomorrow.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Will a nervous child be nervous as an adult?

Not necessarily. Childhood is the best time to learn emotion regulation skills. If these behavioral patterns are properly managed and corrected in childhood, the child will enter adulthood with much better skills. The main goal of neurotic child counseling is precisely to prevent these patterns from becoming permanent personality traits.

2. What is the difference between an energetic child and a nervous child?

An energetic child has a high level of physical activity, but his mood is mostly happy and positive. But the nervousness of the child is characterized by high irritability, low tolerance threshold for failure and frequent outbursts of anger. The main problem is not the energy level, but the inability to manage negative emotions.

3. Does a nervous child need to take medicine?

In most cases, no. The first line of treatment for behavioral problems such as stubbornness and anger is psychotherapy and especially parent training. Drug therapy is considered a complementary treatment only in severe cases where an underlying disorder such as severe ADHD or pervasive anxiety is diagnosed and prescribed by a psychiatrist.

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